From Under Deep Cover

Ja, hey. Seems flying under the radar has pretty much been my bag this year. Partly because I've been really busy this year but mainly because, let's face it, I'm not about to win any awards for my exemplary displays of self-discipline. Meh. So be it.

But now that I'm here, let's see what I can dig up out of the murky recesses, shall we?

I'll begin with the obvious - the new "job":

I reckon it's going okay. I'm not over the moon, thrilled, ecstatic, jumping out of bed to get going every day. But I'm not hating every second, watching the clock for home time whenever I'm in the office either. I like that I get to get into my car 3 mornings every week and drive to someplace and do stuff that doesn't have anything to do with my kids or my household. I like that the little bit that I contribute helps, in some small way, to ensure that the business continues and will eventually begin to flourish.
There are aspects of it that are taking a bit of getting used to (daily production reports, weekly to-do lists, anything that seems vaguely like a mechanism for managing me)and there are things I'm starting to get into.

On the home front, there's not much to report.

My house looks like a house that is inhabited by a large family and, in spite of having a maid/nanny Monday to Friday, it is never quite clean/neat enough that I feel totally comfortable having people round. And yet, I do have people round, at least sometimes. Because if I'm going to live in fear of what people might think of the state of my house, life is going to be a very scary place. So I say fuck it. So be it.

I do look forward to seeing a marked improvement on that particular front in the new year, when the kids go back to school and our Jack starts attending a nursery school. Yep, there's a creche about 200m down the road from the office and we're looking at sending him there next year. It's time, I think. He's bored stiff at home these days, which predisposes him to "naughty" behaviour which, in turn, predisposes me to supercharged levels of frustration and hysteria.

As for the homeschooling, I look back on this year with mixed feelings. I don't regret making the decision to give homeschooling a bash and I don't believe that this year has been a waste or a failure. Could it have gone better? Without a doubt. But I don't regret making the decision and, if forced to repeat this past year, I would probably make the same one again, give or take a few details.

Meanwhile, as my body gradually approaches something like the shape it used to be before Jack and James, I'm making my peace with the fact that I'm not going to have that one last baby. I'm also making my peace with the fact that breasts are something I was only ever going to have for as long as they were a food source. I see plastic boobs in my future.

So there it is. The short version, at least. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to catch up on my blog reading and then to explore the interwebz for some Christmas inspiration and, possibly, some blog fodder.